The Munchkins

Life with identical twins

Decisions and Consequences

on August 21, 2014

This summer has been hard, there are no two ways around that. Lucy and her health were the entire summer. Either I was anxious about how she was doing, or I was grieving. Her death affected me far deeper than I ever expected it to. I have quite honestly been lost without her. I cry every day, I miss her so much.

Compounding that, was my asinine decision to adopt Charlie.


Charlie is mostly a good dog, until he isn’t. But let’s be honest, he’s 10 months old. Getting a 10 month old dog is like getting a puppy, without all the sleepy, newborn, cuddly, fall in love with them part and only getting the yelling at them part. The more comfortable he gets at our house, the more he acts out. In front of other people though? He’s a dream! Perfectly behaved.

Charlie has been a handful for me. He’s barking, he’s chewing, he’s stealing something, he’s destroying something. And it all makes me very angry. Angry because that stupid surgery likely made me miss out on time I could have had with Lucy. Angry because I adopted a dog way too soon, without thinking things through because I was so anxious without an animal in the house. Angry because now I have to deal with this dog and train him, when all I want to do is hide out. And so I’m angry. Angry and sad and angry and sad. I have thought about returning him, but I’m not sure I could do that to Delaney. Long term I think he’ll be a great dog, but long term is still a ways away, and we need to make it there all in one piece.

Angry Erin doesn’t want to be social which iis an issue. I have gone out not one single time this summer. The one time I booked a babysitter was to go to my cousin’s wedding. I keep saying I’m ready for summer to end, because in the fall I can stay home and not feel guilty about it. Tuesday night we took Charlie for a walk and met up with neighbors halfway around the circle. We hung out for more than an hour, and it was incredibly good for all of us. It raised my spirits tremendously, we clearly need to do that more.

A dog trainer is coming to our house tonight, and will hopefully give us some tips for how to deal with Charlie. He has a lot of bad habits we need to break. We’ve taken him for walks the last two nights which exhausts him mentally. It allows him to just lay by me after the girls go to bed, rather than pace the house like a crazy dog, which is a welcome break.

I’m hoping the transition to fall will be good for all of us. It will no longer be the summer Lucy died, but the fall the girls started first grade. Hopefully it will help me move on and past some of this anger and grief. Hopefully Charlie will continue to learn, and eventually be a dog I can enjoy, rather than discipline constantly.

One response to “Decisions and Consequences

  1. Scott Grunst says:

    August 12: “Twice he has stayed in his kennel during the day from 8:15 – 5:15 with zero issues”.
    Is Charlie still spending all day alone in his kennel? This could be part of the problem, just saying.

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