The Munchkins

Life with identical twins

Thank you and some grace

on July 29, 2014

Thank you to everyone who has left a comment, called, texted, emailed, said a prayer, or thought of us over the last few days. I’m not in a place where I can respond right now, just reading them at times is difficult, but please know your support means everything. Truly.

The people I’ve told in person about Lucy have expressed their sorrow, then asked “So how are the girls taking it?” with the look on their face saying they must be crying buckets yes? My very honest answer has been “Actually, they’ve been complete assholes.”

When Maddy died Delaney cried, she slept with her collar, she had nightmares and had to sleep with me, it hit her very hard. Caden too, just not as deeply. But Lucy? All they can talk about is the new dog they want us to adopt. I am broken, and Caden is yelling at me because she wants me to buy her yet one more thing and is pissed that I won’t. I can’t even.

We have had several heart to hearts about thinking of others, respecting someone else’s sadness, and remembering Lucy before we move on. I think I finally got through to them yesterday. When I picked them up Caden asked how I was feeling and if I missed Lucy. Amy and Matt came over for dinner (saviors!) and the girls didn’t mention a new puppy a single time.

I’m going to give them some grace and allow that maybe, this grief was more than they could manage and they didn’t know how to process it. Lord knows, that’s the case for me. And so we talked about how it was okay to miss Lu, and it was okay to cry about that, and that it was okay to be sad. I’d rather they be sad and cry with me, then act like she had never been there. Please don’t ever forget Lu. She was the best, she deserves more than that. I think those words are finally sinking in with them, and hopefully the rest of our week will go much better.

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