The Munchkins

Life with identical twins


on September 29, 2010

Looking at the cycle of child development, there are periods of calm and peace and periods of upheaval. Generally, on the year is the period of equilibrium where kids are consolidating learned skills, and the half year is the period of disequilibrium where there is quick growth and development and they are often learning new skills. Knowing this, I knew that I should enjoy the summer because tough times were definitely ahead.

The rainbows and sunshine haven’t completely left the building, but we’re definitely in a different phase right now. I’ve been thinking about this post for the past few days because really, the rough patches are relatively compressed. There are large chunks of time that are awesome, and then other times where I’m reaching for a beer.

“I do it myself.” Also known as “Mama go away!” This one is mostly Caden. She wants to do everything herself – get dressed in the morning, open and shut every door, get in and out of the truck, buckle her car seat, do the dishes, cook dinner. You name it, she wants to do it and if you don’t let her do it or try to help, she cries. I’ve been trying to let her do as much as possible, but sometimes it just isn’t possible. And sometimes my patience is just at the end, and I don’t need dishes to take two hours while we let the water run the entire time. That said, I’ve noticed that I say no instinctively a lot, especially when we’re going to and from daycare. I say no, she cries, and then I realize that what she’s asking isn’t crazy and won’t make us that much later, so then I say yes. Bad news! I need to be more consistent and think it over before I answer her.

Delaney wants to help, but she’s okay if you help her as well. If she does cry over something, you can generally explain the situation and she’s okay. One morning when she was on the floor crying I told her I knew she was having a rough morning, but I needed her to put on her socks and shoes and boom, she got up and did it. I think for her it’s maybe attachment issues? She has issues when I drop them off, although again, we tell her to smile instead of cry and that mostly works. There are a lot of times where meltdowns happen quicker than they used to. It’s not a tantrum either, it’s a meltdown. (Caden throws the tantrums.) Usually those mean they’re tired or hungry, but my attempts at getting them to sleep earlier hasn’t gone well.

I’ve been trying to put us in situations where no one’s buttons are being pushed. Where they used to walk nicely with me, now they want to be carried or they walk the other way. I’ve limited our outings because it’s more hassle than it’s worth. Even a trip to Target is an ordeal these days. What does seem to go well is playing with other kids, most recently their cousins and the neighbor kids.

There are upsides to all of this, I just need to take a breath and be open to them. Caden really wants to help with dinner and truth be told, she’s a good stirrer. But, the kitchen bar stools don’t work well for her to stand on, so we need something different there. Delaney loves to narrate everything which cracks me up. At least I know she understands what’s going on! She’s become such a little girl lately, it’s so fun to watch.

So yes, be consistent. I definitely need to work on that. I’m also going to take someone out to lunch every week, because I think that one on one time is needed. I just wish they were open to something other than pizza.

One response to “2.5

  1. Annie says:

    I’m so glad you feel better after stopping the probiotics!
    I’m going to monitor Jax, and maybe add one in during illness or if diarrhea comes back, but for now I’m glad to see it’s helping to just leave it out. I hope it continues for you!

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